Does the man in your life want to wear your panties?
When working as a professional dominatrix, my favorite clients where all cross-dressers and sissies. Most of them were married, but felt their partner wasn’t into seeing “The man of the house” in pink panties and lipstick.
I loved cross-dressing and gender exploration because I would get a life size, living, breathing doll to dress up as I pleased. I loved nothing better then to spend an hour or two working on perfecting make-up and helping a curious explorer into panties and heels for the first time. As time went on, I created my own rules for my sissies, my pink posse, and started exploring the many roles within gender exploration.
Miss Vera’s Cross-Dress for Success: A Resource Guide for Boys Who Want to Be Girls was my sissy bible and I sent MANY submissives off to purchase and learn from it. At nearly 20 years old, it’s dated in spots, but so much of the information remains relevant today. And the cover art is amazing! Veronica Vera has a new book now, Miss Vera’s Cross Gender Fun For All, which is more inclusive, including cross-gender play for people of all identities and sexes.
Some studies show that 30% of men try cross-dressing at some point in their lives. With the shame and sigma around men dressing in women’s cloths, I’m willing to bet that number is actually low.
The reason to explore the other gender varies from erotic, political, self expression and any combination.
Some men feel submissive when dressed in women’s cloths following the societal belief that women are the submissive gender, and that’s how they express their true submissive self. Other men simply like the erotic feeling of wearing silky panties against their hard cock. Some like to be shamed for wearing woman’s clothing, while others liked to dressed up and play, shame free.
It’s not uncommon for women to worry that cross dressing is a sign that something is wrong with their partner. Cross-dressing is not a sign of sexual disfunction or a mental disorder. Cross-dressing does not reflect on sexual orientation. If you partner wants to explore cross dressing, it’s not a sign that they are gay. Some men love to be dressed as a slut to feel objectified by male energy, others like to live out their lesbian fantasies. Both are taboo, and many fetishes are taboo driven.
If your partner wants to experiment with cross dressing, find out what it means to them. How do they want to feel? Slutty? Shamed? Playful? Does their cross dressed persona have a different name? What are their favorite types of clothing or fabric? And once dressed, what does your partner want to do? Just hang out? Vanilla sex? Go see a movie and see if they “pass.” Or play kinky sex games from a new perspective.
The most important thing for you to do, is to remember, that your partner wanting to play gender games does not reflect on you or your relationship. They are still the same person. They still love you. They still love to have sex with you. They just want to try it from a new perspective.
I love to work with couples who are thinking about adding cross-dressing or gender play to their bedroom games. If you have any questions, please feel free to email me at [email protected].