I posted this on Facebook, and feel like it needs to be shared here as well. Feel free to take what you need from this to share as you like, but please credit me.
During the last year or so, I’ve had a hard time feeling like what I do matters. Why talk about embracing your kinks when the world is on fire. But something in me broke through that this week.
Women are shamed for our bodies, how our bodies function, what our bodies look like and how our bodies make other people feel.
Our bodies are out for other people to judge, comment on or touch and our feelings are disregarded, brushed aside and laughed at.
We fight to silence the judging that has been prevalent in our life since we were too young to understand and now echos in our head no matter how hard we try to stifle it.
Then we are expected to use our bodies that have never felt like our own, for pleasure. But only certain kinds of pleasure, and only with certain people and only in certain ways while stifling that voice and trying not to associate the unwanted sexual contact from the past with the sexual contact we are trying to enjoy.
I’m done feeling that sex and pleasure is something I can talk about at a more appropriate time, because this is the appropriate time and our bodies and our minds and our desires and our pasts and our self worth are too wrapped up in each other to separate.
Every judgement about our sexuality, our desires, our preferred method of pleasure, our pasts is a hit against our self worth and I am no longer willing to take those hits, or stand by while any of my sisters (trans/nb/fembois/ninjaspacepirates/however you identify) take those hits either.
My space, and the space around me, physically, emotionally, digitally, is a safe space for people to talk about sex, which is so much more then p in v, or friction in search of The Big O.
It includes past body shaming and kink shaming and sexual assault and and bloating and yeast infections and chronic health issues and past judgements.
And really fucking awful political shit shows during which I pledge to talk about kinky sex until women’s sexuality and pleasure (and all it’s messy totally not sexy components) are normalized.
Don’t see an image below that resonates with you? Let me know and we can create one together.